Even Beyonce needed her alter ego, Sasha Fierce, in order to conquer the entertainment industry. And peak performance coach Todd Herman, after working with hundreds of Olympians and champion athletes, has learned that alter egos are an absolute requirement for extraordinary achievement. On this episode of Conversations with Tom, Todd Herman details exactly how powerful the alter ego can be. Along the way he and Tom Bilyeu discuss the need for rituals, share the real stories of how they got where they are, and even explain exactly how to have abundant energy in every area of your life. SHOW NOTES:
Todd talks about what he likes about New York City [1:50]
Todd explains why people struggle with change [5:01]
The common words and phrases we use are actually what trap us [6:51]
The brain tries to protect you from looking like an idiot to yourself [9:10]
Todd explains how environment changes people [11:39]
Todd describes the basic reason people need to create an alter ego [12:47]
We all have multiple identities and uniforms, and they are all flexible and malleable [15:50]
Todd doesn’t need to know who you are, because he can see your results [21:57]
Todd asks “what are you”, not “who are you” [23:10]
Todd doesn’t spend any time talking to people about motivation [24:39]
Todd and Tom discuss how labels trap people and limit them [27:47]
Todd loves archetypes but he doesn’t always use them [32:51]
The most common alter egos people adopt are, surprisingly, Grandmas [34:57]
Todd describes the need for triggers and rituals [39:00]
Todd and Tom discuss the power of birthing emotional states with physical triggers [40:11]
Todd and Tom discuss Sasha Fierce and why even Beyonce needs an alter ego [42:58]
Any time you try to trick, deceive or impress others, it’s not healthy [46:35]
We react to people based on the clothes they wear [48:57]
The study that showed that kids did better when dressed up as Batman [51:03]
Tom strongly advocates self-signaling and using totems to stay obsessed [55:00]
Todd explains why he uses his glasses as a totem and ritual to get into his alter ego [58:17]
Tom strongly advocates decisiveness [1:03:13]
One of the great powers people have is playfulness [1:06:40]
Tom talks about the need for scarring rituals to mark big life changes [1:09:52]
Todd discusses how people’s family narratives can hold them back [1:13:15]
The moment you decide that you want the ball in the final seconds, all bets are off [1:17:13]
Why are horses so empathetic? [1:18:47]
Todd explains how people find the alter ego they need for exceptional performance [1:19:45]
Everything you need to be successful is already inside you [1:23:00]
Pressure does not exist in Todd’s universe [1:24:03]
Todd explains how to rebuild after a crushing loss [1:27:37]
Tom talks about how important it is to love the struggle, not just the results [1:33:20]
You have many identities and many roles that you play in life [1:39:13]
It may be more important to be in a stable hierarchy than to be at the top [1:40:35]
Todd and Tom strongly advocate mentorship and really learning something [1:43:37]
Todd and Tom discuss authenticity and whether there is an authentic self [1:50:00]
Todd explains how he is a completely different person for his family [1:53:54]
Energy is not a tank that gets depleted in a day [1:57:09]
Whatever it takes to get you to take action, do it, even if it’s “fake” [2:01:01]
Tom and Todd discuss the real story on the mindset necessary for greatness [2:03:11]
Todd shares the story of being sexually abused as a 12 year-old [2:08:12]
Tom and Todd discuss the healing effects of MDMA [2:11:33]
Be playful and be Batman [2:15:14]
BOOKS MENTIONED:
“Long Walk to Freedom”, Nelson Mandela
“The Alter Ego Effect”, Todd Herman
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